SOMEBODY STOP ME!

Ever since the decision to undertake the re-write (daunting but not a little bit exciting. But still more daunting than… anyway) I have found myself in an eBay frenzy of mental-sized proportions. My wardrobe has exceeded its fill-by date and I’m no good at chucking away even if it doesn’t fit or look any good.
These are the rules:

“one day I’ll get (back or just) into it”
“one day this’ll be back in fashion”
“one day I’ll like it better cos I’ll be too old to give a toss what I damn well look like” (I fully intend to be a bitter, crusty, moaning old baggage of the highest order)

Whereas what I should actually be telling myself is:
“one day I’ll know better”(I won’t of course – this is ingrained madness) (hereditary)

There’s a White Elephant in my wardrobe and he keeps wanting buns.

I should stop putting a ‘watch’ on every item which catches my eye because it’s fatal. That little *ping* which announces that my watched item is Ending Soon and that’s it.
A well-hidden freakishly scary competitive streak launches me into the “quick-quick-buy-buy-BUY” frenzy and I can’t stop until I’ve managed to out-bid that other person who’s sitting there with a massive make-or-break re-write to do but leaps at every *ping* opportunity thrown her way to duck out of it briefly.
Only it’s not a brief ducking.
The minute I’m committed to buy I start to sweat. Too late. It’s not like having a try on in the shop and deciding it’s not really what I want. That’s it. No returns. Stuck with it for the rest of my days.
Re-list it? Yeah, yeah it would be SO simple, wouldn’t it?
But then I’ve got to take a photo of it, decide how much I want to start it at, angst for 5 days over why nobody wants my cast-offs and then worry that what I’ll get won’t cover the price I paid for it in the first place – plus there’s that tricky question of how much postage – oh AND having to buy a bag or two to put them in – and then that trip to the Post Office … my God, does it never end?!
That level of hesitation and anxiety I could do without right now. I’m in the middle of a re-write, didn’t I tell you?