Sunday, 18 October 2009

X-Factor Twins (prove the) Rule!


In a week where personal opinion is made public, I have decided to air my own.

Those zealously gelled X-Factor twins are on Hit-lists all over the show (see what I did there?) to be dragged kicking and screaming in a very inharmonious fashion, from the X-Factor stage.
Thing is they won’t be.
And why won’t they?
Quite aside from the fact that their continued presence there is a bit biased:

* by the whole of Ireland and Louis’ family calling in to vote,

* because if Simon WAS so dead set against their being finalists, then he’d have had the power to have overruled his team-mate,

* and, paramount, it retains enthusiastic viewing figures because the whole country tunes in hopeful of watching them be voted off,

like it or not, they actually DO have the X-Factor.

Which is precisely why they’ve been allowed to remain in thus far. Simon’s no air-head. He might be Botox-ed to the gills and have the hair-do of a Gorilla, bless him, but he’s not stupid. In fact I have the utmost respect for the guy (apart from the weird things he had at his 50th – which could have been his crisis-point or a cry for help). And everything he ever says (music-wise) I always wholeheartedly agree with.
‘Y’know,’ he said last night. ‘In a strange was it was like watching the Exorcist for the first time time… although you hate it, you just HAVE to watch it again.’
Absolutely spot-on.
They are certainly an embarrassment to music lovers everywhere and if this was Britain’s Got Talent, they wouldn’t have got this far – because they haven’t. Got any talent.

But they DO have the X-Factor.

And what is this elusive factor called “X”?
The ability to humiliate oneself in front of cameras, whether unbeknown or engineered. These boys are either incredibly dense or incredibly clever. Either way they have managed to already make a name for themselves without having one talented cell in their combined bodies.
I didn't so much cringe last night at their pathetic attempts to sing whilst trying to remember their silly little 'moves', as applaud their bravado for giving it a go and making themselves look so foolish.
And they’ll get to the semi finals (I might eat my words after tonight’s voting of course, and I shall eat them with relish) because it will make great viewing. In much the same way as Chico was – and Same Difference. It’s cringe-worthy viewing and doesn’t the viewing public love to have a good squirm at the expense of somebody else?
Big Brother?
Living Like Animals?
Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Dating in the Dark?
Need I go On?
And whoever decided last night that on Diva Night they should be allowed to sing a Britney Spears ‘classic’ is just typical of the mentality of the X-Factor producers. If I am living in a world where Britney is already a Diva, then please stop the madness, I’d like to get off.
And have a pee. But then I’d get right back on again because it’s compulsively irritating.
And that’s what makes somebody somewhere an awful lot of money – oh, and the world go round, no?

4 comments:

Clodagh said...

Aw, I love the twins - I think they're brilliant, and the only thing worth watching on the X Factor.

They're perfect for it. I love that they don't take themselves or the show seriously. It's a crap show, and they celebrate crapness and have a great laugh doing it.

I also love that they're not always bawling about some dead person who's watching over them, or moaning about not wanting to go back to their 'terrible' life.

I think they should win! True, they can't sing or dance, but they are entertaining. And do we really need yet another 'diva' warbling her way perfectly through 'I Will Always Love You'? Yawn!

By the way, you can't vote from the Republic of Ireland, so it's not just us lot and Louis' family keeping them in.

Deb said...

Agree, Debs. It's addictive and compulsive viewing. And look what happened to the Cheeky Girls, the Samandra twins, etc. They may not have an ounce of talent bewteen them, but they've all made careers and a lot of money out of being entertaining. Good luck to them.

Fionnuala Kearney said...

God I couldn't disagree more strongly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
X Factor is billed as a singing competition to find a 'recording artist' - see my blog on this today!
I loathe them. Get em off. If I want to be entertained by gel brained creatures who cant sing, there are other places to find them. God forbid. Fx

Debs Riccio said...

Oooh, knew I'd stir up a bit of a hornet's nest with this one. They should have called themselves 'Marmite' - at least it's catchy. Unlike their attempts at performing anything.Gah!