Saturday, 2 May 2009

Have you heard the one about.... Swine Fever?

We had jokes about Bird Flu.
We had jokes about Mad Cow Disease.
We even had (in hindsight, extremely BAD taste) jokes about AIDS.
So why not jokes about the latest 'fashionable' pox to hit our shores causing pandemic-pandemonia?
Actually the only one I heard was from a radio two broadcaster who quipped that she wasn't unduly bothered because it only affected men. Ha! Swines - that'll teach 'em!
But the biggest laugh we've had in our house recently came following last night's BBC 'news coverage' of the latest British person to have contracted this disease (is it a disease? Is flu a proper disease?). Anyway - this guy had caught it - I believe from someone he came in contact with on a flight from Mexico or something - don't quote me on this - my memory is sketchy at the best of times.
The report seemed to be highlighting the fact that this guy - who is now 'quarantined' in his flat until further analysis and recovery can be made - passed his germs onto one of his mates who also now has the disease. The lady reporter was speaking to Quarantine Guy on her mobile from the relative security of her car outside his flat and asked him how he felt about being diagnosed with Swine Fever. His reply?
"I was a bit disappointed to be honest".
Why? Had he expected something a little more serious? TB perhaps? The Bubonic Plague?
He was then asked how his friend had felt about contracting the disease from him and he replied:
"He was a bit cross with me."
So - a threat to our National Safety? A possibility this will reach epidemic proportions? The fact that there have so far been 13 cases in the UK does not a crisis make, surely? And if Quarantine Guy is taking it all so gamely with the damning threat of imminent death hanging over his head then lets make him our Swine Fever Ambassador - we could all take a leaf out of his book when we've been told we might bump into the Grim Reaper.
Swine Fever? To me, this looks more like a strain of flu that nobody had records of just yet although your common or garden Amoxycillin will probably cure it if caught early enough.
Oh - and it IS a helluva way to take our minds off the boring old Credit Crunch, isn't it?


Jacqueline Christodoulou said...

Hi Debs - I love your blog and I've added you to my blogroll at dirtyparkle! Hope the books are coming along well, I am looking forward to seeing them published as they should be.

Deborah Riccio said...

Hi Jacqui, Thanks so much for having a wee read and loving it - will add you now you've just reminded me I haven't!!! Up to 63thou on the latest and can't see it ever ending - that'll teach me not to over-sub-plot!!!

Fionnuala Kearney said...

He Debs, I think the government and media just like to keep us living in fear......x