Thursday, 14 May 2009
It wasn't supposed to happen like this!
From an early age all I thought I had to do in life was hang about looking mysterious, winsome and put-upon until an equally mysterious yet enigmatic masculine form thundered up on his charger and swept me 'away from all this' and onto the lands of Happily ever After.
This simply HAD to happen because that was how it happened in every book I'd read and every film I'd watched - so it had to be true. And if by some fluke I happened to be kidnapped and sold into white slavery or taken to a nunnery by accident then I'd spend my lifetime of servitude in a brown horsehair twin-set looking all pure and innocent until aforementioned Mr Mysterious with his charger still somehow found me. I'd be on his TomTom, after all. Because that was what he'd been conditioned to do. Find me. I'd be his quest.
But nobody told me about the dusting. Or the having to go out to work. And the cleaning, the hoovering (see very first post), the endless cooking and shopping and ... did I mention the dust? Where the hell does it come from? Okay, so Snow White did a bit of 'whistling while she worked' but then she had the good fortune of having every forest creature ever invented at her service (although WHO in their right mind would slip a plate back into the cupboard after having it LICKED clean by a friendly deer? per-lease!).
Do I have to have one?
I mean, do I?
How the heck am I supposed to realise my dream of getting a(nother) book written when there's always so goddamn much other stuff to get through?