Monday, 8 November 2010

The Spin-Doctor will see me now

Unusually, totally out-of-character, I have decided to put a positive spin on things.  In particular, these things, and, as Dermot always says, in no particular order:

  • the shite wet, freezing, bastard miserable weather outside today is, I’ve seen reported, apparently the tail-end of Hurricane Jedward which hit the UK from Ireland last night.  And even though I’ve never know of an upside, Jedward-wards, this means that when the husband gets home he will be building us a fire of castles-at-Christmas proportions and we will slurp soup from our laps (and, in a bowl, obvs) in front of a Downton Abbey catch-up and flick synchronized birds at the inclement goings-on outside the snugness of our front room. And answer the door to no-one but the lady who delivers the news of a Lottery win.

  • my NanNo word count is remaining at a rather unimpressive ZERO, or maybe just 2, counting the title. Because I needed to unburden myself of additional pressures this month and it actually does feel like a great weight has been lifted.  Therefore I will NOT be obsessing over how many Buddies-of-mine are haring towards the 50,000 word mark, nor will I be reading their impressive excerpts of literary creation and thrashing myself with a metaphorical birch twig at my own pathetic attempts at writing, and more pleasingly, I will NOT have another book that is half-written half-loved and half-baked.

worth enlarging, if you know what I mean
  • the menopause is just another way of telling me I’m as normal as the rest of the female population who’re also ‘enjoying’ (see what I did there?) this condition.  It doesn’t mean that I’m a dried up, unproductive old prune who'll give up the root-retouches and hack her hair into a short-back-and sides to ease air circulation and reduce full-on-tropical hot flushes. Nor does it mean that I will be spending any more time scrutinising my upper lip and chin areas for unwanted hairgrowth than I already do.  It does mean, of course, that I shall be turning the central heating down a lot more and encouraging other house-users to wear more clothes.  If I’m going to ‘enjoy’ this metamorphosis then I don’t see why others shouldn’t enjoy it too.
  • ...piggy-backing this period (did you... yep, I know, I didn't mean to insult your intelligence)  of transition, it also means that I don't have to spend a small fortune buying silly little panty liners, awkwardly-shaped internal sanitary devices,  ringing dates on the calendar and constantly wondering if I'm pre-menstrual or not - I was clearly born irritable. I will learn to embrace it.  No, I will. What? You want to make something of it?

  • the so-termed ‘writer’s block’ is merely another way of giving me more time to spend doing proper, houseworky, housewifely things.  Like cooking.  Dusting.  Cleaning.  Cooking.  Dusting.  Cleaning. Nope…. This is one ‘thing’ that I honestly can’t put a positive spin on….

  • Ah well, I had a go.



9 comments:

Talli Roland said...

I think you've done a great job putting a positive spin on things, Debs. Happpy lovely rainy Monday!

Lane said...

The weather is indeed vile. So vile in fact that I didn't spend any extra time in the bathroom today checking for facial hair growth. It was too damn cold and dark in there:-)

Enjoy your cosy soup slurping.

Debs Riccio said...

Talli, thanks, I tried... I really, really did!
Lane, it was too blinkin' dark to check hair of any kind this morning - I went to work looking like I'd got dressed in a cupboard - which is a good thing of course! *smiles positively* *perhaps a bit scarily*

Jacqueline Christodoulou said...

Ah facial hair growth - I recently bought one of those new gadgets that rip your hair out by the root allegedly painlessly.
Seriously, I'm seriously menopausal but learning to just give in to it, hair and all! And soup, yes, definately soup :-)
Write when you're ready; I'm only doing it becasue I'm off work sick and v. bored! TBH more concerned about hot flushes and facial hair than word count.

Claire said...

Well it made me laugh so my day is more positive already.

Deb said...

Lol, Debs! Have you been reading those self-help books again?
xxx

Debs Riccio said...

Jacqui, NaNo is a great diversion for other things and I bet it's giving you plenty to take your mind off your healing back - which I hope is feeling much better now... I've heard that what you're writing right now is the *best* work you've ever produced - proving the gain and pain theory!
Claire, I'm glad it made you smile, chicken. Well done with the WW results, btw. Good going!
Deb - you KNOW I've been sniffing about at self-help and scoffing about it, but it's only people like YOU who keep me sane, seriously it is... thanks for just being *there* x

Caroline Green said...

I'm so glad FB reminds me of blogs because I ALWAYS forget to read them...I need one of those blog-reading-reminder-thingamajigs.

Anyway, loved this...it's amazing what a little spinette can do to change a mood...

Debs Riccio said...

Ha! Thanks Caroline - nice to see you - to see you NICE!